As a Ranswi

‘If you were born as a Sahbut, Would you still agree that the Ranswi are the superior race?’ Ms. Elizabeth came to the nation of Silhari to interview the 33-year-old Warlord and dictator named Kingnis.

Kingnis came to power two years ago through a military coup superseding the democratically elected Ranswi-led government by killing Pomghi, the president. Sahbut and Ranswi were two ethnic groups living in that region together with conflicts for centuries. Or, the historians conveniently told them so.

‘If you were born as a pig Ms. Elizabeth, What would you be doing? You would have not learned to talk, travel and interview. You would have felt content staying in the mud forever eating feces.’ — ‘Ask legit questions.’

‘Pomghi is not a pig. He is a Ranswi too. Why did you kill him?’

‘He is not a pig. He is a worm in the mud that pig lives in. He favored Sahbuts in unacceptable ways. He allowed them inside our schools, workplace and food places. He had to be eliminated.’

‘What makes you think a Ranswi is superior to Sahbut?’

Kingnis turned to his ministers standing behind the camera. ‘If I slap this woman right here, Will there be consequences?’. The ministers started whispering to each other.

‘Please wait, Ms. Elizabeth.’ Kingnis said and patiently waited. One of the ministers came and whispered in his ears. He turned to the interviewer.

‘What makes you think we are equal to them? They are mannerless, illiterate swineherders. They are born to live, feed and die with swine. Ranswis are farmers. We grow food. Our literature and scriptures talk about it. The Lord chooses who to be born as a Ranswi and who to be born as Sahbut.’

‘Sahbut had literature too. Your government destroyed them. They were not given education by the Ranswi government for the last 30 years before Pomghi finally allowed them. Why so much hatred? They look similar to you. Are they not your brothers?’ The interviewer asked. Kingnis looked at one of his ministers. He signaled no.

‘You have questions?’

‘Why can’t you treat everyone like the same. Bring peace in the country and stop the genocide that you are doing.’

‘Genocide? It is a war that is happening for centuries.’

‘When will it end?’

‘It will end when the Sahbuts submit or leave the country. When will this interview end?’

‘Can a Sahbut convert himself to a Ranswi to live peacefully?’

‘If a bunch of pigs knock at your door and want to live with you in your home peacefully, Would you allow it? Or you wake up one day and find lots of pigs living with you in your house, What would you do?’

‘Thanks for the interview Mr. Kingnis. It was a pleasure talking to you. The interview is over.’ The interviewer said without a smile and got up.

God rewound the time and made Kingnis born into a renowned Sahbut family and fast-forwarded 33 years.

***

As a Sahbut

‘If you were born as a Ranswi, Would you still agree that the Sahbut are the superior race?’ Ms. Elizabeth came to the nation of Silhari to interview the 33-year-old Warlord Kingnis.

Kingnis captured the nation by killing Pomghi with his troupe two years ago. Although the Sahbut population is outnumbered 3 to 7, Kingnis managed to keep the nation under his control through extreme measures.

‘Yes. Sahbuts are hunters and warriors. For centuries, Sahbuts have lost so many lives living on the outskirts and protecting this region for centuries while the Ranswis were living peacefully in the country. If I were born as a Rasnwi, I would have felt ashamed every day of my life.

‘Do you believe in Democracy Mr. Kingnis?’

‘Not until we level up the Ranswi population with ours.’

‘So, What measures are you taking for leveling up their population?’

‘We have taxes, limited education, birth rates, and limited land rights. As a result, they are fleeing in herds.’

‘So, That is your explanation to the disappearing Ranswi population?’

‘Yes. They just flee. Men and women.’

‘It looks like they are going nowhere Mr. Kingnis. What is your take on with the genocide allegations made on you?’

‘Sahbuts have always been the victims of the massive genocide until I got the power. We are outnumbered 3–7. Learn the history before talking, Ms. Elizabeth.’

‘If everybody from the opponent clan wants to convert themselves into your clan and wants to stop this war and hatred, Would you allow it?’

‘Life is harder as a goat. Goat can not convert itself into a tiger to not be eaten. They have different purposes. Goat’s purpose is to grow itself healthy and be eaten.’

God stopped, rewound the time and made Kingnis born into a peace-loving, not-Ranswi and not-Sahbut family and fast-forwarded 33 years.

***

As a peace-lover

‘Is it moral to drive out an entire population because of their race?’, Ms. Elizabeth asked the warlord Ngunmati.

‘What is moral? In our scripture, Our God demands to drive out Sahbuts from this land. Whom should we listen to? You or our God?’ Ngunmati asked.

God learned that Kingnis was killed at a very young age in an ethnic cleansing act done by one of the governments. He rewound. Kingnis was made to born into an extremist family. Which clan, Ranswi or Sahbut? you may ask. But it does not matter.

***

As an erratic extremist

Kingnis grew up fearless and erratic. He conquered the nation at his 27th age. He killed the group of investigators sent by the world peace organization formed by the developed nations to investigate the on-going Silhari genocide.

They formed special forces to assassinate Kingnis. The Silharian jungles provided all sorts of comforts for Kingnis to take on the enemy forces through guerilla warfare. Kingnis realized it won’t last forever. He knew the opponents were working with the international forces and he will get caught one day or another. To stop this once for all, Kingnis grew his alliances around the globe. He started plotting and attacking important cities of the developed nations to send them a message. Kingnis became a world-level threat and a sensation.

The developed nations saw Kingnis’ world-wide attacks as a great opportunity to go full-on mode. They started bombing Silhari towns were Kingnis’ clan people were living more. They continued to take one town after another. Kingnis had no choice when his people’s population was plummeting. He did not want his clan to go extinct. He surrendered at his 28th age. He was assassinated the same day and a “peace” government was formed.

Ms. Elizabeth never got introduced to the Silhari genocide and never became a journalist in the first place. She married a simple-man called Sam, his neighbour and lead a happy life.

***

God took his glasses off and sighed with relief.

He took Sam’s application and marked it with a tick having a Martin Scorsese smile in his face. ‘Sam… such a nice boy.’ He said.

He took the next one. It read, ‘God, I want a big car. (Bigger than Nancy’s)’.

God stopped, Called it a day, Brushed his teeth and Went to bed.

‘Nancy asked the same, last week.’ He murmured in sleep. ‘These women Urghhh!!!’ and started snoring divinely.

***

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